Who knows. Maybe it has just been too long. And I have been lost. And I have had this desire. It has never been easy. I haven’t been easy on myself. I haven’t been myself. Maybe because I need to leave. Maybe I need a Getaway.
It has never been easy. I haven’t been easy on myself. I haven’t been myself. A constant struggle, longing. And a desire. Desire to leave. Leave. Leave this chaos. Chaos of life. Who knows. A chaos that I am responsible for. Dealing with this abiding desperate desire. The need to breathe. Breathe in middle of nothing but trees. With not a soul around. Only mine. I want to take the first road that I see and walk and walk. And walk. And still find nothing but the sweet company of the cold breeze, after countless hours of walking. Allow the drifting breeze to slyly pull my smooth scarf away, along with a part of me. I want to sit on the highest cliff I could climb. And feel my cold freezing hands slowly go numb. Hear the white noise grow louder which will be my only companion. I want to spread by body on the mild warm sand grains and stare at the sun doing his daily chores, go down only to rise up again. And soak myself in to the music of waves and feel the warm humid air touch my hair now and then, like the faded memories that come alive in my mind, when someone long gone bumps into me and turn less vivid after sometime. I want to avoid falling and hold myself strong on the muddy path amidst the rain forests. A path leading towards something unknown. For I know I am strong, and life has been so. Unsure, unpredictable and bewildering. I want to let the light drizzle kiss my skin and liven it up, while I stroll around. Skin. My skin which has been shouting to get away from the chaos and has been begging for recuperation. I want to sit before a stretch of land and trees that are a riot of color. And soothe my eyes that have so far just been seeing the grey concrete and crowd. A color riot of bright yellows and greens, with no borders. I want to feel the soft grass under my feet. And let them all blades of grass team up with the playful wind to play the game of Touch-n-Tickle with me, while my eyes are shut. I want to open my eyes to nothing but the dimming sun and the loudening chirps of crickets and the happy birds flying back home. My mind has no records of something like this. Probably because old memories are eventually erased, just like the echo of someone you once knew. Who knows. Maybe it has just been too long. And I have been lost. And I have this desire. It has never been easy. I haven’t been easy on myself. I haven’t been myself. Maybe because I need to leave. Maybe I need a Getaway.
“Painted Getaways”. Putting together a series of paintings I recently made, of places I have been day dreaming of for a long while now. Have spent the last two days Painting My Getaways. To be honest I am not very skilled but have always liked to paint. Cannot recall why I stopped. Glad to start again.
Medium : Watercolor